Though my prayers officially do, it's not every day my חת"ת goes to מערת המכפלה בחברון.
Tuesday, December 06, 2016
Thursday, November 17, 2016
Y'know what's amazing about living alone?
You can eat an entire container of mint chocolate chip ice cream in one sitting and nobody will know!
And y'know what's terrible about living alone?
You can eat an entire container of mint chocolate chip ice cream in one sitting and nobody will know...
Sunday, November 06, 2016
Wednesday, October 26, 2016
Nay, resnuck upon.
Arghhhh can I tantrum stamp that it's not fair????
I thought I was DONE with this!!
Argg, what's the good I can find?
Alright, a laced heart untied.
And less judgment towards others.
Argghhhhh not good enough, Tatteh, not good enough.
Sunday, September 25, 2016
Friday, September 23, 2016
Monday, September 19, 2016
Sunday, September 18, 2016
I muse, the more you strengthen your self-control muscles and your trust in the Rebbe, the more likely you'll be able to withstand the (nearly) irresistible pull to the glory of G-d up There and insist, rather, on sending Moshiach to redeem all.
The advantage some have - moi possibly not excluded - is feeling at times pleasure and connection to the physical world.
Tuesday, September 13, 2016
Sunday, September 11, 2016
Wednesday, September 07, 2016
Maybe Hashem made dawn follow every night because otherwise we'd have a hard time believing and expecting the light after/from dark idea.
On second thought, light follows night because in upper/deeper/spiritual realms that's the case so naturally it will extend itself to the physical as well.
Tuesday, August 30, 2016
Tonight, I am ready to post and conquer this one, with the help of G-d Almighty.
And that hidden treasure lies buried here; for G‑d dwells in darkness.
Monday, August 29, 2016
Thursday, August 25, 2016
Sunday, August 21, 2016
For many years Rabbi Sholom DovBer of Lubavitch suffered from ill health, compelling him to undertake many trips to various European healing centers to consult with medical specialists.
On one such occasion, a professor-physician who had examined and interviewed the Rebbe categorized his ailment in the following manner: the heart craves something that is beyond the capacity of the mind, and the mind understands more than the heart can bear…
Thursday, August 18, 2016
Thursday, August 04, 2016
Sometimes, when you're walking down the street, maybe even trudging, just doing what you gotta do, you pass a rock and think "Oh wow what a perfect rock to rest on!" and then you tell yourself no, you must move on, and so you move on, and then you think "wait, Hashem put that rock there for me!" so you go back and rest, and get energy for your walk, and share it with others so they too can get energy.
Monday, July 25, 2016
Friday, July 22, 2016
Will they say that while she was everywhere, she was really nowhere?
Did everything but nothing?
Plowed, planted, even reaped but never tasted her crops?
Will she taste her crops only once she goes?
Will they say of her, when she goes, that everyone knew her but nobody did?
That she smiled, laughed, joked and cried with all but always all alone?
Will they miss her if they never had her?
Will the world miss her if it never had her?
Will they say of her, when she goes, that she finally found her place and her home?
It's good to cry.
It's good that I am crying.
It's OK to be crushed.
It's good to be crushed.
It's good that I am being crushed.
It's OK to be overwhelmed.
It's good to be overwhelmed.
It's good if your overwhelmedness makes you feel crushed and makes you cry, cry out to G-d.
Monday, July 04, 2016
(from an article by the brilliant r' aron moss )
Sunday, June 26, 2016
Friday, June 17, 2016
"That's cool. Well, that's cool and that's not cool."
"Whatcha talking about? What's cool and not cool?"
"Well, it's cool that you stick to your religion but it's not cool that you lose business over it."
"Hey, if I believe in G-d enough to listen to His rules, then I definitely believe He's not gonna make me suffer cuz of it."
(chuckle) "You're right."
Monday, June 06, 2016
"You have to begin with the knowledge
that there is nothing perfect in this world.
Our job is not to hunt down perfection and live within it.
It is to take whatever broken pieces we have found
and sew them together to create beauty."
Oxygen for my soul.
Friday, May 27, 2016
Bose headphones and Alaska and loud music in my ears,
Stuffed Koby and a wooden desk and movies of good tears.
Words to write up any day, moment or mind-shift,
Smiles, jokes and inner rock for every mood to lift.
I'm blessed in my hunger, on my blankets and my all.
And I've just been reminded every leap comes from a fall.
Tuesday, May 24, 2016
If it was golus, we'd argue over time zone truths, secretly at best, openly and ferociously at worst.
But it won't be golus, so we'll all happily, peacefully and gracefully agree without anyone feeling rejected or compromised.
O how sweet Redemption will be. How very sweet indeed.
Sunday, May 22, 2016
Tuesday, April 19, 2016
War and fights and struggle, I like. External, but that's rare to come without internal too. Comedy and history are nice but it's the drama of battle that lures me. I don't like violence or death or pain. I shudder and turn away and block it out. But soldiers and boxing champions are something else.
You'd think I'd welcome a break from the battlegrounds but nope. Is it cuz it's the only thing that resonates as truth? Is it cuz I get motivated and inspired? Is it cuz I feel comforted to recognize it's not just me? Is it 4:36am and I have to go to sleep?
Wednesday, April 06, 2016
That moment when your gangster boxing teacher asks you what was the most dramatic thing that happened in your elementary school where you work, and you answer, "when the students break their inner nature", and you get a priceless look of confusion as to which bone that is and what weapons were used to achieve that.
Tuesday, March 22, 2016
"I once told someone I'll fight until my body falls apart," he said tonight.
"It's happening," we said at the same time.
"Stop before you kill yourself," I said.
"I need the money," he said.
"You wanna be rich and dead," I half-asked, half-said.
"Yup," he said.
"And I'll leave all my money for ... the people I don't even have," he said.
"Oysh. Don't make me so sad for you," I said, and punched out the next combo.
We would LOVE to you have all Ladies (you and your friend and friend's friend!) for Shushan Purim seudah and Pesach meals in Shmuel Hanavi Maalot dafna area. In general we are often available and love to host for shabbosim as well and we do have 3 sleeping spots when they are claimed early. For shushan purim seudah everyone brings a dvar torah or inspirational story. Spread the word and be in touch!!!!!!!:)
See, now getting an email like that makes my heart feel like it's gonna burst. They left their email address and phone number, I'll give em to you if you pass my security clearance.
Monday, March 21, 2016
Sunday, March 20, 2016
Nissan 27, 5775 · April 16, 2015
Think of yourself as a city. You have four magical gates: The Gate of Seeing, the Gate of Listening, the Gate of Imagining and the Gate of Speaking.
Magical gates, because an Infinite G‑d enters your finite city through these gates. An infinite G‑d who cannot be squeezed within any place or boxed within any definition, but chooses to dress neatly in a wisdom called Torah—and these are your gates by which wisdom may enter.
That is why all the world competes to storm those gates. They want you to see the ugliness they see, hear the cacophony they hear, imagine the nonsense they imagine and speak without end. And then, you will desire all they desire and no room will be left in your city for that Infinite G‑d.
You only need master those gates and the city is yours.
Thursday, March 17, 2016
Tuesday, March 15, 2016
It is the way we lock ourselves inside each of these, begging them to take us as their slave; the way we sacrifice upon their altars our dignity as human beings.
Whatever matter of this world you enter, stay higher, stay beyond. Remain free.
Friday, March 04, 2016
Thursday, March 03, 2016
Sunday, February 28, 2016
If a song of my life is ever created after my death, I want it to be a happy, optimistic, positive one. Even the tune should be bouncy, jolly, catchy, not somber no way.
Since the world doesn't read my blog *gasp* I better up my life a notch in that direction so they get it on their own.
Peace, love, joy.
That is life.
Friday, February 26, 2016
Tears and hurt. Anger died. Dead inside. Let it end and begin the start. Dark and fog.
Secrets. Hidden. Try and try. Climb. Escape. Dig now. Always dig. No use to run. Holes. Black holes. Dark light. Why'd he kick me? So glad I don't care deep.
Trust mistrust love and betrayal. Ages of doubt. Caves and caverns of patterns of lost and found.
Thursday, February 18, 2016
Monday, February 15, 2016
Sunday, February 14, 2016
Wednesday, February 10, 2016
Wednesday, February 03, 2016
Friday, January 29, 2016
Ripe juicy fruits of blessings
Everywhere I go
The curtain in my room to give me privacy
The clean shower
The shelf, drawer and hanging space
Heating and air-conditioning
Free use of car
Abundance of food
(plus allowed to cook my own)
(that's so appreciated, the parentheses should be removed)
Rack for my shoes
Washing machine and dryer, whenever I want
The sounds of family talking, moving, laughing
Safe place (in a cookie-meet-cookie-zapping-in-all-direction way)
Loads of seforim (n books)
Quiet at night
Chassidishkeit in the walls
My blessings overflow
Ripe juicy fruits of blessings
Everywhere I go
Here, at home.
Thursday, January 28, 2016
Make Up Your Own Life
Tammuz 16, 5775 · July 3, 2015
This is why the details of your mission in this world are withheld from you:
Out of G‑d’s great benevolence, so that this little creature can decide on its own and partner with G‑d in its own life.
Wednesday, January 27, 2016
i wanted to start with a soft small furry light-brown puppy snuggling
but i started it with rocks
even digital darkness
hate the small hopes
but it gives life
i suppose it gives life
past the moment
and goodness for others
is life too
compose yourself, for a laugh
laughs clear most