Monday, September 22, 2014

Jacob and the bust of Stalin (joke)

When Jacob is finally given an exit visa by the Russians and allowed to immigrate to Israel, he can only take what could fit in one suitcase. At Moscow airport a customs official shouts, "Open your case."
The official searches the case and pulls out something wrapped in newspaper. He unwraps a bust of Stalin.
"What is that?" he shouts.

Jacob replies, "Don't ask 'What is that?' - ask 'Who is that?' That is our glorious leader Stalin. I take it to remind me of the wonderful things he did for me and the marvelous life I leave behind." The official sneers. "You Jews are mad. Go. Take the bust with you."
At Ben Gurion airport, a customs officer says, "Shalom. Welcome to Israel. Open your case!" Jacob's case is searched and the bust is found. "What is that?”
"Don't ask 'What is that?' - ask 'Who is that?' That is Stalin. I want to spit on him every day to remind me of all the suffering and misery he caused me."

The official laughs. "You Russians are mad. Go. Take the bust with you."
Jacob arrives at his new home. His nephew watches as he unpacks. Jacob carefully unwraps the bust of Stalin and puts it on the table. "Who is that?" asks his nephew.

Jacob replies, "Don't ask 'Who is that?' - ask 'What is that?'
That is five kilos of gold."

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