Wednesday, April 07, 2010

Myth: Little Sisters Have Feelings

I don't know where it comes from, this myth. This myth that little sisters have feelings.
They're little. And they're sisters. That's a double clue right there.
So you're an adult? Accomplished? Az mah?
You are still a little sister, so you still have no feelings. Especially around other people.
Maybe when you go to sleep at night, sucking your thumb, tears fall on your pillow. I dunno. That's not our concern.
In public, you have no feelings. Case dismissed.

Unless of course, you're a little sister who has correctly concluded that in order to succeed, you must often step out of line and march to the side, drumming your own beat.
In that case, you don't even have feelings in private. Your pillow stays dry eternally.

But you're not the only one without feelings, little sister.
Not everyone has feelings.

Janitors don't have feelings. I mean, all they do all day is take out garbage. And they barely speak English. Anyone who doesn't speak English, doesn't have feelings. Duh. (Including, of course, those who speak English with a funny accent. If you can't speak English clearly, you are plainly lacking any sort of feeling in your heart. Need I state the obvious?)
Talking about obvious, why do some people still not realize that one who walks with a limp is one without feelings? Remember-an injured leg drains the human heart of all feelings.
Old people don't have feelings. After all, they're OLD. You can talk about them in front of them. It's fine, they probably don't hear well anyhow. Neither do the people stocking the shelves in the supermarket, by the way. And even if they do hear you, well they don't have feelings. They're shelf-stockers, not real people with real feelings.
Flight attendants are not real people either. Sure they LOOK like the rest of us. They walk, talk and dress like us. But they're not real people and they don't have feelings. Think nothing of rolling your eyes, glaring nastily or just completely ignoring them. Why would you pay attention to something with no feelings?
Like your boss. Bosses don't have feelings. Especially big bosses. Full permission to snicker and/or gossip. Unless, of course, YOU'RE the big boss. In that case, your employees are the ones left without feelings and you can go ahead and belittle them. In public. Strange, isn't it?

Where does it come from, this myth? This myth that everyone has feelings.

If you bless in a different language, you obviously have no feelings.
If you dress with a different design, you obviously have no feelings.
And definitely, if you drive slowly, you possess zero feelings. It's almost pointless to yell at such people cuz they won't be hurt, anyway. After all, they don't have feelings.

You still insist that everyone has feelings?

Haven't you seen the woman who cleans your toilets? (She's cleaning TOILETS!)
The woman who does your nails? (She's doing YOUR nails!)
The young man who brings the food from the restaurant kitchen to your table? What about when he messed up your order? You still think he has feelings? HOW CAN SOMEONE WHO FORGETS TO SLICE YOUR MUSHROOMS HAVE ANY FEELINGS?! HE LEFT YOUR MUSHROOMS WHOLE!! HE HAS NO FEELINGS!!!!

Not everyone has feelings. It's an absurd myth.

15 comments:

mishmum said...

W O W !

the sabra said...

That's "mom" upside down.
Or rather, "M O M !" upside down.
That's a pretty silly parent right there.

the sabra said...

Tricky tricky exclamation mark!

Rachel said...

This is my favorite piece.

Rachel said...

Hi Mishmum.

the sabra said...

You make me puke, Rachel. Which makes me teary-eyed.

Barouykzich, Mishmum. It's a JOKE.

the sabra said...

(but seriously, wow. thanks a lot.)

ChayAiz said...

good writing

whats ur point?

do you have feelings?

I am a sabra and I have feelings

es said...

Hi. In case you thought I no longer read your blog, I read this post. I liked it, but had no specific comment to make. Hence this rambling, non-relevant comment.

the sabra said...

Yay :) I'm happy when my old faithful friends read my blog...

Yossi said...

I like this a lot. nicely written

the sabra said...

Thank you

C said...

<3

Benny said...

in case you think i dont read your blog either..im super tired but i read your blowg
cuz i luv the blog that the lady i luv luvs to write.

Gutte nacht
GREAT piece btw

the sabra said...

Benny, benny!
I thought we discussed that you would leave comments bordering on the inappropriate, for private email! I don't think the whole blog world has to know that you, and I quote, "luv" me.