Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Learning & Teaching

"A prerequisite for learning to infiltrate into all crevices of the mind and breath, is to teach that very same subject to another."

-Mion X. Perrientz

Purim with The Muqata جميل في المقاطعة

so if you wanna join jameel's crazy purim podcast party, read here for instructions as to how you can submit your material. he warns that it must be funny. (oyyyy why does he make life so hard for me??)

Davening on behalf of shidduch-seekers (EMAIL I RECEIVED)

Can you think of at least one person who needs a shidduch?
If you answered yes, you should continue to read this.

Last year thousands joined from across the world to help their fellow Jew…

From Brooklyn to Belgium, Shanghai to Spain, Melbourne to Montreal, Los Angeles to London, Miami to Moscow, Argentina to Austria, Johannesburg to Jerusalem and the list goes on and on…

This year you can do the same!

We urge you to join us in what we hope will be even bigger and better than last year. Purim has a koach of tefillah like no other day in the Jewish calendar- even our Day of Judgment is called Yom HaKippurim (LIKE Purim). We cannot fathom the power of each and everyone of our tefillos and it is with this in mind that we urge you to join us in achdus this Purim to possibly make a difference in the lives of those you love.

This Purim we are once again trying, as members of Klal Yisroel, to help one another find their b'sheret, one perek of Tehillim at a time. We are trying to complete Sefer Tehillim as many times as possible as a z'chus for shidduchim for all those in need. On Purim day at 10:00am EST, we ask that all people recite one perek of Tehillim and have in mind the name that you are davening for. It can be yourself, your sibling, a friend, classmate, co-worker, WHOEVER. The idea is that you're focusing on that person. At 10:00am we are going to read off all the names we have compiled and finish Sefer Tehillim. Our hope is that by davening for one another Hakodosh Baruch Hu will see our efforts and in turn answer our tefillos b'shah tova, b'karov.

So what is it that you have to do exactly?

1. E-mail with the Hebrew name ( e.g. person's name, son (ben)/daughter (bas) of, mother's name- for example: Yitzchok ben Sara) of the person you are davening for. For each name you submit to us we request you say a perek of Tehillim accordingly (that's a perek per name you submit). We choose your perek and we will e-mail you back what your perek is (Please note that no one person will be assigned perek 119- it has been divided into 4 sections).

2. At 10:00am E.S.T. on Purim Day, March 4, 2007/ 14 Adar 5767 say the perek/perakim you've been assigned. (Please note that if we have enough people in Yerushalyim interested in saying a separate Sefer on Shushan Purim we will try and arrange it accordingly)

3. Send this E-mail to all those you know!


-PURIM 5767

Any questions or comments may be directed to

i miss you

Sunday, February 25, 2007

Bella Bellissima?!?!

anyone else thinking 'what the heck??!?!'

Bella Bellissima

This is a story worth educating children with
Tuesday, 12th May, 1992
A woman steps out of her house in Jerusalem
Normal standard day nothing special like any other day
A load of kids in the streets – there was a teachers’ strike
Same time exactly a revolting terrorist
Pulls out a kitchen knife and with it stabs two innocent kids
Another mad cruel attack
Another nationalist attack

He sets off running because a mob is in pursuit
And catches him after a few seconds in the carpark
tens of people kicking him – they want to close the score
I don’t judge them, it’s an irrational event
It’s a flawed situation, awful, revolting, unclear
But then turns up the woman and alters the end of the story
because she straight off throws herself on the terrorist and
protects with her body the terrorist who is also a human though without her body would have ended up a corpse
"I don’t understand, weren’t you afraid with that madman beneath you and the mob so close?
"Wouldn’t it have been easier to get up and leave?"
She replied to the journalist that she didn’t have time to think.
She replied to the journalist that she didn’t have time to think.

Bella bellissima...

That incident with the woman is engraved in my head
Where did she get the strength to lie there without moving, without fear
I ask myself what I would have done in her place
If at the same moment I had been in the area
It’s clear to me that I wouldn’t have gone over to boot him
But to be fair and to tell the truth
I don’t think I would have been capable of behaving like her
Much more typical for me to get up and run away
Or at the most to try to find a policeman or something
But she lay there until her strength waned
20 minutes she took all those kicks
Her kids watched and didn’t stop crying.

Bella Bellissima…...

This lady did not turn into a symbol
And in effect her name has been erased from consciousness.
There is no stamp with her face
Perhaps because Israel is not yet ready and is not willing
To bring to its breast a hero
whose heroism is not war-like, a hero
whose heroism is not military, a hero
whose heroism is just moral
a hero who is a woman, and a haredit at that.

Know this, dear woman, that I did not forget
The story of your heroism I promised to myself
That this story is worth educating children with
It’s a story that is worth educating children with

Bella Bellissima...

(click the title for the lyrics in hebrew)

my obsession with israel

someone commented on an old post just now, asking if there is any one post where i explain my obsession with israel
there isn't really, but to get a bit of an idea, you can read the following posts of mine:

...Just Had To Make Aliyah
Why I Miss Israel
why i dont miss israel
exclusively israel
Why I Am Not Afraid
soldier davening shacharis

im sure there are more, but those are the first that come to mind...o and there's also this ode to israel that was written on a different blog, in my honor :)

anachnu rotzim mashiach achshav!

Don't be a Bulach!

and chut'z m'zeh, you MUST obsess yourself with this blog-The Daily Derher

Here's a preview as to why...
Remember those days back in school (maybe nursery) when your class had a class plant? Usually, it was some sort of bean. Within a day or two, the class went wild as they saw that first green growth just above the dirt.

Why was it that it was always beans that were grown?
I saw the answer last night in a Maamer from 5717 the full post here

Thursday, February 22, 2007

last night i got a phone call...

like u mighta guessed from the title, last night i got a phone call.
i was in my room, sick and tired (both sick and tired, and also sick n tired) when i got the phone call.
i was in my own world, i was annoyed with so many people, i was frustrated at my own irresponsibility, i was sad and hurt at the behavior of others, and then i got a phone call.
from the moon.
yes, my friend was calling from the moon.
im assuming she was delivering some chocolate baskets to a senior citizen home that recently moved to the moon.
but i could be wrong.
either way, she called.
i told her "give me a few minutes while i just sit here and get over the shock (..and yes, im still standing)"
i was flabbergasted
i was thrilled
and i was so bloody happy.

so we spoke
at first it was a teeny bit um maybe not really but kinda a bit eh like not exactly but sorta..awkward? (just for a bit!! cuz i had forgotten what it's like to talk on the phone to friends!) but after, woah.
woah it was good.
completely flowed.
so she asked me how i like it here, how i get along with the folk, how i like my work and my life.
and we laughed hehe when she said how she would answer people when they asked me about my life here. hehe. i do the same thing about others. "...yknow there are good things and bad things, but she's managing.."
she asked, and i answered. and it was exhilarating cuz she cared. (or you're a very good actor ;) ).
so i told her what frustrates me, and i told her what gladdens me and i told her how im trying to use these rocks bein thrown at me as stepping stools for further growth.
and we laughed so much
and then i asked her about her life, about school, about shlichus and i didn't ask about her store (gulp)
and she told me everything
and she described her advancement in frumkeit schooling (eh you know what i mean), and all about her peulos (yes i remember the chanuka pics), and she told me about money, about tutoring, about her car, about her choices.
about her future
and i was glad to be a part of her life once more
and i took her 'issues' seriously
(yknow crashin into cars as a result of laughin while drivin on the highway)
and we laughed so much
and even when we got temporarily disconnected and i called her back, we were still connected
and then we spoke about making reizi proud
and i said how far i am in tanya and she said i shouldnt say 'i only did...', i should say 'i already did... and only have... left to do'
and i loved her for that
and she told me that she had a final during chanuka but the girl who was to take over her shift in wonderland (wo)manning failed to she skipped her final, nothing to talk about.
and i loved her for that also
and i was so grateful to hashem
grateful that He sent me what i so badly needed
truth is, He always does-
send me what i need
but not always is it so clear
so obvious
and man was it obvious last night
thanks so much ad
thanks so much for calling me
i love u tons even though i never say it and it even sounds weird as im writing it now...

p.s. you didn't send me the code you promised
p.p.s. i thought u weren't linkin to ur nebach blog anymore
p.p.p.s. dash cham to ur freak of a friend (i know i know u don't have a choice, ur on the same block..)
p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. stop pushing off writing to the rebbe-it'll save u lotsa heartache and headache. ya ya i know you know.

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

stupid snow

stupid snow doesn't take away irresponsibility
stupid snow doesn't take away dusty throats
stupid snow doesn't take away tiredness

stupid snow ruins new boots
stupid snow fogs glasses
stupid snow is cold

snow is stupid

and because of all the potential that this stupid gorgeous snow has, it irritates all the more..

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

I'm not dead! Do you hear me?*

The suddenness of life. Instant strife. Cut through like a knife. Split second here then gone. What did I do wrong? And even if I did, can I not sing the song - of life, I’ve got children and a wife. A son engaged to be married overseas. Minding my own business, why'd you shoot me, please! I demand to know. Was it something I said? For now I'll close my eyes and rest my head. But although I'm gushing blood and consciousness, too, I’m not dead. I'll be back, I'm not through. Reeling them in one at a time, you'll pay for your crime. Crimes against humanity, run now, but just this time, I'm coming back again, but not to get you, you see, it's G-d who is master of creation and is tzedek/justice, it's up to his mercy. Set my soul unbound by the Brooklyn concrete light. I don't fight, I take flight, gone in the sky, back another day, this message I'll relay: Set my people free from Brooklyn slavery. Set me free. That's it, my delivery.

Delivery from a nameless enemy, making victims from afar. Your gun is a coward, you’re busted up, insides ajar. Comprehension to a minimum, blinded by your muzzle flash. Past, again climbs to the night, frightened by your trigger pulling finger, you turned around in flight. Darkness of the night covering over actions so impure. Writing rhythms over blood, you're dance will hit the floor. No gore for my listeners, beseeching up above, that your justice is meted out - by the heavens, not white gloves. So stuff your pain, and now regain your consciousness, realize this game you've lost. Brooklyn circles jugular, in disdain you count your loss. Try not to edit thoughts as they flow in tears, a stream. Hot reminiscent flashes, bright focused laser beam. Burning scorching over underwritten crimes in 71st precinct. Under noses, tense and smelling. Crown Heights took a beating.

Time slows down, down to the sound, flying faces all around, lying dirty in this pit, RIP, is what the rock reads, etched in stone, doesn't have to mean forever, you see, one day the Earth will heal my flesh and I will repossess my soul from ancient days, gone not. Now back to the fore, back for more, up from the floor, will come bodies, emptying graves, alive as day, day forever now, taking the time to stretch away, one long day, of sleep without a peep, deep under, sometimes six, sometimes not, thunder felt in chests, rained on pained, limbs whole and complete, competition to a low, or not at all.

Dancing now, on the snow capped graves that you once dug for me, I thank you in person, for your most profound, mitzvah above all - one of truth. but now no need for truce, the truth has been revealed: One Life, One Will, One Love, One G-d.

His chants so sweet and pure now emanating from every. . .door's smashed down to the ground, concealment no more, know that I'm only as alive as my source. I did not survive, but was revived. The time is now to indulge in all that G-d gives us. So I shake off the dust, Arise!

*written by Saad, a year ago; read by the sabra, a year ago; the pain in the world, from forever ago....
now i read it again; now i shivered again; and soon i'll be frozen again towards what happened today, a year ago...

[this is another post from my heart and not my pen]

Monday, February 19, 2007

Saturday, February 17, 2007

stop makin me think of titles for everything!

Q. whadaya call a jew that wonders?
A. a ger tzedek with a pooch that sometimes bites

(am i right or no?)

random posts of the past.
written on the right.
stam, sheteidu.

Friday, February 16, 2007

"Two things are infinite: the universe and the human stupidity", said Albert Einstein, "and I'm not sure about the universe".

Stop caring so much!

stop caring about things you cannot help!
stop getting headaches from other people's family problems!
stop investing so much in others when it will only get deflated!
stop crying yourself to sleep two nights in a row because you found out that your friend's father passed away 5 years ago!
stop getting heartaches from fights between 3 year old kids!
stop sweating from stage fright when seeing an actor get on stage!
stop having mercy on those that don't deserve it!
stop feeling bad for overworked housewives across the sea!
stop protecting others and start protecting yourself!
stop chasing after still ones!
stop nourishing at the risk of self-undernourishment!
stop feeling guilty when thinking about those less fortunate than you!
stop expanding yourself till the point of bursting!

stop loving!
stop sharing!
stop giving!


Tuesday, February 13, 2007

re the latest meebo messages

stam i didn't get to read the ones from the past few had to be shut off....those messages were if you wrote s/t important, know that it was not received...and if you wrote s/t that was completely not important, know that those weren't received either...and if you wrote nothing, well, that i received.

happy thanksgiving.


like simchas beis hashoeva at the bhm"k
complete and total

Benny Hershcovich (Montreal, Canada) to Sonia Rodal (Milan, Italy)


Sunday, February 11, 2007

talking to yourself

Yeh, I agree-talking to yourself out loud is weird.

It's just as weird, 'smatter of fact, as writing your thoughts down in a journal.

i hate this picture

Welcoming the Shabbos Queen

"You're so funny, y'know. I don't get you. You get all dressed up for Shabbos, you spend so much time getting ready and looking nice, everything matches and finally looks 'perfect', you look perfect, and now you go and ruin it all by putting on a sports sweatshirt! What's the point? Why did you work so hard if anyways no one is gonna see it!?"

I get dressed to honor Shabbos. Not for anyone else to see.

"Ok so why do you cover it with a sweatshirt then? You don't look 'Shabbosdik' anymore!".

Tell me something, this Shabbos, this Shabbos Queen that we welcome-she's physical? She cares what I wear? She will be insulted if I'm not bedecked in my finest?

"Well, no, she's not physical but she deserves to be honored and welcomed as if she were a queen of flesh and blood. And if you say that not, that she mustn't be honored such, well why did you spend so much time getting yourself ready? Why did you agonize so long over which color earrings and which style skirt would look best? "

Listen, the Shabbos Queen comes whether I prepare or not, whether I'm ready or not, whether I look presentable and honorable or not. Her arrival is not dependent my welcome. However, I personally want to feel ready. That's why I work so hard to look my best for when she comes. I want to be completely certain that I am welcoming Her Glory properly. I want to feel deserving of her presence.

"Ok fine, that makes sense, I can accept that. But I'm still bothered by the sweatshirt. I don't understand. Why ruin your beautiful welcoming look with something so unattractive?"

My friend, I did my part in welcoming Shabbos. I worked hard to look presentable and now I feel ready for Shabbos. You are correct that I've covered it all with a bland sweater and now I look 'not so ready'. But tell me, The Shabbos Queen cannot see what's hidden?
OMGGGG AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


thank You hashem for everything You do and thank You for permeating me with this peace and joy.

Friday, February 09, 2007

"Envy is ignorance"

Times of Label #6

He often uses his teeth as a jacket grasper so he can pull his hand out of the sleeve.
I want him to learn to do it the proper way and I am quite strict and serious about it.
I started laughing though when I heard myself say-
"Use your hands, NOT your mouth. If you have a problem, just use your hands."

It's hard to be G-d

check out today's thought of the day
(found on the right-foot side of my blogaroo, 'neath the meebo monster)
tis the dessert of my latest post
let's eat

Thursday, February 08, 2007

When G-d Sends Snow

And G-d looked at His world and He saw the alleys and the fear, the homes and the abuse, the adults and the anger, the children and the confusion, the offices and the insolence, the hospitals and the doubts, the teenagers and the hunger, the homeless and the starvation.
He looked at His world and He saw shattered hearts and shut hearts, empty nests and overcrowded nests, lost children and children running away, closed fists and closed bank accounts.
He looked at His world and He saw regret, homesickness, disappointment, anxiety, guilt, discomfort, embarrassment and longing.

G-d saw all this.

He saw all this and as a strategy to melt away the fear, abuse, anger, confusion, insolence, doubts, hunger and starvation from His world; in an effort to clear the hearts, arrange the nests, bring the children home, and re-deposit the money in His world; in a process to purify the regret, homesickness, disappointment, anxiety, guilt, discomfort, embarrassment and longing of His world, G-d tenderly and, at the same time, harshly sent down into His world precipitation formed directly from the freezing of the water vapor in the air, in the form of ice crystals, mainly of intricately branched, hexagonal form, gently covering all surfaces with a precise hug of white.

And all we saw was snow.

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

A True 'Chanuka Miracle' Story:

Since Chanuka, we've had the leftover olive oil that was used for the menorah just lying around. We knew that we were not allowed to throw it out but we didn't know what to do with it so it just stayed in the cups of the menorah.

Finally, yesterday afternoon, my friend says "Zehu, I'm going to burn it already".

Surprised, impressed, happy and relieved, I watched as she poured the pure olive oil from the burnt glasses into a new clear glass.

"I'll just let it burn till all the oil is out", she turned to me. "There's tons in will last forever. It will burn longer than a yahrtzeit licht does".

I nodded my agreement.

"You know", she said, struck by a sudden thought, " There are so many Jews. I'm sure there is someone out there who's yahrtzeit it is today. However many years ago, whichever country it may have this candle can be in their will be a yartzeit candle for them".

"Sababa!" I exclaimed enthusiastically, loving the idea. "Y'know, even anyone who was murdered in the Holocaust or burnt during the Inquisition period-let this be for them! What's the date today? Yud Zayin Shevat? Ok, whoever passed away on Yud Zayin Shevat and needs it-this candle will be a yartzeit licht for them."

We were both quiet for a few seconds, thinking, contemplating, musing. I don't know about her, but I was certainly overwhelmed. Overwhelmed that I was so easily part of a race that allowed something so little to represent and to accomplish something so huge.

And then the quiet drama was over, and we went our separate ways.

Hours later, she accosts me breathlessly- "You'll never believe it! I just got off the phone with my brother and he told me oh my gd..!"

Nearly 23 scenarios run through my head during the few seconds it took her to catch her breath and finish her sentence...

And then she said, "He told me that tonight, Yud Zayin Shevat, is our great-grandfather's yartzeit!!"

Now think, dear readers, think of all the components that turned this into a Small Miracle.
-the oil was lying around for weeks and weeks and was not taken care of until BIDIYUK that day
-we were going to give it to our rabbi to deal with, but she 'randomly' and suddenly took things into her own hands.
-she lit the candle just after the sun was set....and the 16th of shevat faded away, welcoming the 17th.
-she mentioned how it burns as long as a yahrtzeit licht which brought her the idea of dedicating this as a yahrtzeit licht
-it was specifically HER that lit it..and not anyone else that was responsible for the oil/the mess.
-she spoke to her brother, which is not a common occurrence, and he 'happened' to mention about the yartzeit.

now don't give me coincidence maisos, you hear?

p.s. My mum always says "Whatever you do, you do for yourself".

Sunday, February 04, 2007

And the city streets will fill....

Jerusalem, if I forget you...

Out of the mouths of babes and sucklings....

It's gonna be the kinderlach....

And Mordechai gathered the children of the city....

i wonder if i like you, too

whoever sent this to me, thanks :)

i did enjoy it (all seven times)

Saturday, February 03, 2007

Know Thyself (The Secret to a Great Relationship)

"To match couples together is as difficult as the splitting of the sea," the Talmud states.

What is the meaning behind these words? True, the process of finding and maintaining a life partner may be challenging and difficult, nothing short of a miracle. But why, from all miracles described in the Bible, does the Talmud choose specifically the miracle of the splitting of the sea – described in this week’s portion (Beshalach) -- to capture the process of marriage?

Click here to read the Kabbalistic explanation to this answer, as discussed by Yosef Y. Jacobson.

see post below

But then again, she's also the one who told me "I kinda feel like we all have souls..and that each soul has a specific thing to do in the world..and so when a person dies, his soul will come back into someone else who will finish off what he didn't do..."

that definitely makes me wanna whistle to the tune of 'ita cray'

Friday, February 02, 2007

an ita cray moment

"...but I feel that The Ten Commandments have nothing to do with religion."

now what you supposed to say to that??

Thursday, February 01, 2007

N.Y. Court Ruling: Suicide Bombings in Israel Violate International Law


a walk in the drizzle

a young man is walking in the drizzle...he has a sefer under his's early evening...5, maybe 6's dark's light inside..he's thinking about the shul he just exited....visions of holy souls scattered around...enclothed in bodies....the noises...the hum of learning ....his eyebrows bunch together in concentration.....he might be mumbling about something....he is planning on coming back soon....he just needs a break now...he will go home, unwind a bit and then he shall return...his shtender awaits.....he brings the sefer closer to himself...he feels grounded, he feels like flying...he feels accomplished, he HAS accomplished...he has nourished his soul with the only thing that can keep it alive-the toras chayim...he continues walking...against the wind...his scarf is flapping this way and that way....he's warming up the world whether he's aware or not.....the cold is there but he doesn't give heart.....he is clutching the sefer a bit tighter though...he's holding onto something real

a young woman is walking in the drizzle...she has a box of printer toner under her's early evening...5, maybe 6's dark's light inside..she's thinking about the home she just exited....visions of holy children jumping around...enclothing souls ....the noises...the shouts of children living ....her eyebrows rise in mirth...she might be giggling about something....she is planning on coming back soon....she just needs a break now...she will go to school, unwind a bit and then she shall return...the children await....she brings the printer toner closer to herself...she feels grounded, she feels like flying...she feels accomplished, she HAS accomplished...she has nourished the children as only a woman can-with proper nutritious food, served with love...she continues walking...against the wind...her shawl is flapping this way and that way....she's warming up the world whether she's aware or not... ..the cold is there but she doesn't give heart.....she is clutching the printer toner a bit tighter though...she's holding onto something real

...and in the eyes of G-d, it was one and the same.