Friday, January 19, 2007

On Heroes, Honey & Hurting

Dovid tagged me to write about heroes. Before I do that though, I gotta de-tag myself from AnonymOOkie and CS. (Kinda like when you wanna open a new apple juice carton but you still have an old one open...)

They say I gotta write 6 things that are weird about myself.
Huh?
Six things that are weird about the sabra?
Err anyone else find that daunting?

So instead, I'm gonna take the liberty of just writing some things (6, 6 + 6 cuz I was tagged twice, ani yodaat? mah zeh mishaneh bichlal) that I thought about this week in association with the word 'weird'. Meaning, either I thought that it was weird, or I thought that it was weird that people thought it was weird or I thought it was weird that no one else thought it was weird, or it rhymed with weird...

Here goes (in no particular order...except one which I cannot reveal but you wouldn't understand anyhow so it makes no difference):

1. I recently began putting honey on ALL my lunch foods. Whether its rice or whole wheat pasta, whether its green beans or baked potatoes, whether its pita or OK YOU GET THE IDEA, I put honey on EVERYTHING. I will not swallow a morsel of lunch food if its not smothered (ok, sometimes tis only drizzled) with honey.
I don't think it is so weird, but maybe a little bit; my co-worker thinks its mishug.

2. People do onto others what they wouldn't want done onto themselves.
I think that is most outrageously weird.

3. When I wake up in the morning, I am rarely shocked that Moshiach isn't here.
That's weird. And embarrassing. (ahem, you know who, I thought about it honestly and realized that first thing in the morning, it's not what I usually think about. err, it's quite rare that it's the first thing..and if it is, i'm not shocked. only upset and annoyed.). Very weird. Very embarrassing.

4. Besides for makeup, my makeup bag is also home to a dreidel, some rocks and a bullet.
I guess that's weird.

5. Sometimes, when I'm walking myself and feel most connected to Hashem, the thought will suddenly come to me that the cat I see sitting on the doorstep, or the worm crawling on the leaf are gilgulim of neshamos that are waiting for me specifically to elevate them, to finish that one last thing that they came into the world for. So I'll recite a 'random' perek of tehillim or possuk from chumash a 'random' amount of times...and then wait for the creature to shrivel up and die.

It never happened. But I keep doing it.
It definitely weirds me out and I wish I'd stop doing it.

6. They say that shared joy is double joy and shared sorrow is half sorrow. I find it to be the opposite, at times (not always, mind you). That when I share my joy, it gets diminished and when I share my sorrow it only increases.
Weird of them. All of them.

7. My dead sea facial wash is made in the usa.
Weird.

8. I view my openness as a vulnerability to others. Others view it as an intimidating factor.
Weird.

9. Someone once told me that they needed tehillim said for them. I said ok. A few days later (after the date passed and the tehillim was said) we began discussing something personal and suddenly our conversation/disagreement turned into an argument which turned into an insult-fest which led to a swordfight err lets not get carried away here, ah? what was I saying? oh, ya, the conversation. so ya, next thing I know, the jew tells me 'I regret telling you about why I need tehillim said or asking you to daven'. completely thrown off, I automatically 'judge favorably' and assume it's because of he's in (physical) pain at the moment. His response? 'No, it's not. It's because of your uncalled for harsh reply. I can do without your tefillos if you are going to talk like that'.
That is the ultimate weirdness in my eyes-that a Jew will say he regrets asking another Jew to daven. And noch, it's after the fact-after the tefillos were said, after the tehilim recited, after the bakashos requested-he says that he can 'do without them'?
Nu, it's a bitter golus.

10. The fact that people in the world think that Israelis are the ones oppressing the Arabs (um Palestine does not exist, sorry kids).
Besides for that being weird, it makes me angry. Like I said, it's a bittere golus.

11. When I take off my glasses, my vision is blurred. That's cuz my eyes are weak and the lenses fill in for strength. When I take off my glasses, I automatically assume that the vision of everyone else in the vicinity is also blurred. I forget that my nose was the only resting spot for my spectacles. Then I talk and move as if all are in the same sitch as I am. I NEVER remember (not to pick my nose....)!*
It's weird that I make that same assumption EVERY time. Gotta speak with other glasses-wearers...

And the last one-
12. I notice there are many children who wear rainboots and don't jump in puddles. What's wrong with you kid?? Adults, I can understand-they don't want to ruin the rest of their clothes, they are too heavy to lift their whole body at once, they are embarrassed to be seen jumping and splashing in the waters...ich veis?...but kids? Why aren't they all hopping and dancing like wild Indians? Why aren't they bouncing and stamping in the waters?
It's weird, admit it.


And now, ever the one to follow rules, I hereby tag the sabra.


*we do this in real life, as well. sucks.

14 comments:

the sabra said...

woah, i got tagged and im the first one to comment.
my lucky day!

so tell me sabra, must i really do this tag thing? cuz i hate the pressureeee

the sabra said...

hey sabs-
yes you do.
sorry.
its a bittere golus ;)

the sabra said...

bseder
yknow its funny-you kinda remind me of myself for some reason. its weirds me out a bit.
im not sure if you think the same way but...
oh hey! i can use that for the first thing on my 'weird' post.
yayyyyyyy

the sabra said...

k ur just weird
i knew i shouldn't have tagged you.
i take it back.
and yo, stop using the same sign-in name as me. it's going to confuse people.

bye

behave!

the sabra said...

behave?
ok i will
i'll behave...


...like a naughty naughty sabra!


ho ho ho!

the sabra said...

oyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

Nemo said...

She carries a single bullet in her purse.... seriously is the 'psychotic Sabra'

Nemo said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Dovid said...

Weird..
Great writing. Lots of fun to read.

ma said...

k you are exempt from sending the postcard.

anonym00kie said...

youre awesome :)

#5 was a little creepy
#6 was so painfully true

the sabra said...

sabras-
pipe down.
all of you.

nemo-
(shrugs)

dovid-
baruch hashem.
im happy :)

ma-
right! (say it in the tone)
and btw, i neva had to in the foist place..

anonymook-
walla, u agree w/ #6?? i thought i was the only one who felt like that!
and for the record-
ur awesomer.

Don't be fazed; What's in a name? said...

Perhaps she shares joy with Nisht Farginners and sorrow with Nisht Farshteyers.

A theory I'm testing (borne of a discovery just like yours): It's not what you share, but with whom, and why you share it with them.

And number 4 you guess is weird? Hmmm.... weird.

the sabra (who tagged and got tagged) said...

granted