Friday, July 21, 2006

I thought, O I thought

I thought
I thought
that if I shared
if I bared
dare express
dare undress
my being
what is "me"

Then, I thought
I thought
that you'd hear
you'd care
do your best
never rest
hunting for the key
to what is the "me"

I thought
I really thought
that you'd feel
want to heal
mend the hurt
cleanse the dirt
trying to free
what is the "me"

Cuz I thought
I thought
that if i were to clam
construct a thick dam
put on a show
never let go
you would not see
what is the "me"

And I thought
I thought
that I'd be to blame
losing my small game
wanting to hide
crying inside
not able to be
what is the "me"

So, I thought
I thought
you'd expand your heart
to let me take part
and you wouldn't smirk
cuz you'd want it to work
allowing a "we"
from what is the "me"

I also thought
I thought
you'd have the sense
not to make it tense
not blow your lid
make me small, a kid
thus causing to flee
what is the "me"

I thought
Yes, I thought
that seeing me strong
when doing no wrong
and seeing me shake
with every mistake
you'd grant me my plea
simply to let me be
what is "me"


But I thought wrong.

14 comments:

Pragmatician said...

Well who can be himself around anyone, really?
It's too much to ask from people.

socialworker/frustrated mom said...

Beautiful! I wish I felt comfortable being "myself" around people but it's just not the way it is.

kasamba said...

I hope you can just be.






Beautifully written.

wishes outspoken said...

perhaps you thought right, just you scared me ****less

Scraps said...

Wow...that's gotta hurt. :(

I can relate.

aliza said...

chav this is a gem. truly.

it's thrilling for me
to behold the unfolding of thee

remchalamo said...

You thought... but if you keep thinking...? Do... Be...
I speak to myself as i tell u these words...
As long as you are confident about your insecurities you'r already doing good!

chanie said...

I thought wrong, too. And I don't like what happened afterwards.

the sabra said...

thanks kasamba and aliza

pint-sized said...

You've managed to sum up everyone's one fear of being truly happy to be different and the same simutaneously. Realy beautiful

the sabra said...

actually i was writing about opening up to a person close to me, and them not accepting/validating my feelings with the grace i thought it deserved.

shavua tov to all of klal yisrael.

pint-sized said...

sorry, mis-interpretation

timothy said...

[emphathy] Hey! July 21 is my bday. :)

the sabra said...

sababa