Monday, July 31, 2006

Blue Spiral #1

[reprinted with permission from the BLUE Spiral]

As I ambled down the quiet busy streets and the busy quiet streets, many poetic lines and flowery thoughts raced through my head-like school children scrambling to be first on line. Each one confident that they have that unique something to make them stand out and be deserving of the head of the group.

Yes, each one is vital, is special, is "madhim!" but each one shines with a different light, with a separate strength, from a distinct angle.

So the children, so my emotions and memories.

Some were cheerful, some were wistful, some were brilliant, some were heated, some were humorous, some were painful, some were anxious and nearly all, butterfly producing.

And all deserved a place. In an organized fashion.

But who can straighten out unruly kids and unruly thoughts with chumus smeard hands and ribbon tied legs?

My heart thumped awkardly when the sheirut passed Machon Meir and my brain sizzled frantically with the realization that the whiteniks belong to a different world.

I belong to a different world.

It's time for my journey back to the world which I never left...and time to decide which schoolchildren deserve to be at the head of the line.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Fearing Our Own Strength

......Israel has begun the "surgery" to cleanse its environment of the noxious diseases of terror and lust for Jewish deaths. But when the blood caused by the surgery begins to gush forth, the UN may condemn, the State Department may criticize and the Israeli left will become self-loathing. The Jewish state might then be compelled to "sew" up the wound before the infection has been eliminated. If that happens, the infection of terror will be allowed to simmer beneath the surface until the next explosion occurs in a year or two or ten. (The Arabs, it must be said, have lots of patience.).........Time and time again, the State of Israel has proven the truth of the ancient saying, that when a Jew finally makes a fist, he bangs it on his heart to confess his wrongdoings.....

Click here for the entire article by Rabbi Yosef Y Jacobson

Friday, July 21, 2006

I thought, O I thought

I thought
I thought
that if I shared
if I bared
dare express
dare undress
my being
what is "me"

Then, I thought
I thought
that you'd hear
you'd care
do your best
never rest
hunting for the key
to what is the "me"

I thought
I really thought
that you'd feel
want to heal
mend the hurt
cleanse the dirt
trying to free
what is the "me"

Cuz I thought
I thought
that if i were to clam
construct a thick dam
put on a show
never let go
you would not see
what is the "me"

And I thought
I thought
that I'd be to blame
losing my small game
wanting to hide
crying inside
not able to be
what is the "me"

So, I thought
I thought
you'd expand your heart
to let me take part
and you wouldn't smirk
cuz you'd want it to work
allowing a "we"
from what is the "me"

I also thought
I thought
you'd have the sense
not to make it tense
not blow your lid
make me small, a kid
thus causing to flee
what is the "me"

I thought
Yes, I thought
that seeing me strong
when doing no wrong
and seeing me shake
with every mistake
you'd grant me my plea
simply to let me be
what is "me"

But I thought wrong.


Hizbullah Chief Hassan Nasrallah (yemach shemo) sent his condolences to the family of the two Israeli Arab children killed on Wednesday by a Katyusha rocket in Nazareth. “I apologize to the family,” he told Al-Jazeera. “We consider them shahids for Palestine.” (saw it on Ynet)

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Why I Am Not Afraid

A close friend told me the other day, "If only the Rebbe would be able to assure us that everything will be okay-then I would not be scared".

I answered, "The Rebbe told us many times* how Eretz Yisrael is the safest place. What more do you want??"

The response? "I want a personal promise; and until I get that I won't be satisfied"

This is my personal promise.

*The rebbe actually tells someone on the video-why do you want a blessing from a human when Hashem Himself blessed and promised us safety 3,000 years ago!

** I never tire from watching this video. I think I can safely say that I've viewed it more than 100 times during this past year alone. These holy words ring true from generation to generation, situation to situation.

i hate them hate them hate them

I hate the Nazi Germans for setting constant fear in the hearts of the Jews.
More than the hunger or the pain, it's the cold gripping fear that makes me burn with anger.
The unknown, the decisions, the selections, the choices. The fear.

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Images of War

(click on the title to view more war images
as well as the blog where I got this picture from)

chabad doin mivtzoyim with the chayalim

Today, Tsach volunteers visited IDF soldiers at army posts in the north, laid tefillin with them and encouraged them. Rabbi Aharon Pruss, coordinator of Tsach's activities with the army, headed a special team to the north that visited Kiryat Shemona and to settlements in the Western Galilee until Naharia. The Chabadniks laid tefillin with them and distributed cakes and drinks and encouraged them. "The soldiers received us with joy and were revived by our cheering words", said Rabbi Pruss to COL. Tsach is also planning additional activities with the soldiers. (

(click title for pictures)

oy eretz yisrael, im thinking of you...

(thanks aliza for the pic)

Monday, July 17, 2006

baruch dayan ha'emes

St.-Sgt. Osher Damari, 20, from Netanya who was killed during an IDF operation in Shchem, Sunday.

Sunday, July 16, 2006

our words are our swords

there are some that are sitting on couches and there are some that are sitting on chairs
there are some that are dressed in robes and there are some that are dressed in suits
there are some that are under bat mitzvah and there are some that are grandmothers
there are some that are not yet religious and there are some that are chabad
there are some that are quiet and introverted and there are some that are friendly and loud
there are some that are obviously wealthy and there are some that are quite poor
there are some that are from a sefardi lineage and there are some that are ashkenazi
there are some that are coming from next door and there are some that are from a mile away
there are some that are fluent in hebrew and there are some that are struggling
there are some that grew up in israel and there are some that are never visited

All gathered together to say tehillim.


Because our brothers in eretz yisrael are being attacked right now.

And those rockets do not discriminate; they are aimed at all types of Jews-

those that are sitting on couches and those that are sitting on chairs
those that are dressed in robes and those that are dressed in suits
those that are under bat mitzvah and those that are grandmothers
those that are not yet religious and those that are chabad
those that are quiet and introverted and those that are friendly and loud
those that are obviously wealthy and those that are quite poor
those that are from a sefardi lineage and those that are ashkenazi
those that are coming from next door and those that are from a mile away
those that are fluent in hebrew and those that are struggling
those that grew up in israel and those that are there for the first time

so we shan't discriminate either

בתרגילי חילוץ והצלה בלב ים

טיל איראני פגע בספינת טילים "אח"י חנית' של צה"ל. ארבעה חיילים נהרגו, שלושה מתוכם עדיין נעדרים. לפני כשנה, הוזמן COL לסקר תרגיל חילוץ והצלה של צה"ל, צבא טורקיה וצבא ארה"ב בחופיה של ישראל, וביקר בספינת "אח"י חנית'.

(click on the title for more pictures)

Saturday, July 15, 2006

whether you are tearin out ur hair, sippin hot chocolate, shoutin at the tv screen, dialin israel non stop, loungin in ur salon or organizing rallies-

(note updated tehillim request as well as the names for tefillah)

Leading rabbis and kabbalists are calling on people worldwide to recite Psalms, especially Chapters 13 (hebrew, english) , 70 (hebrew, english), 83 (hebrew, english), 120 (hebrew, english), 125 (hebrew, english), 130 (hebrew, english), 142 (hebrew, english) and 150 (hebrew, english).

Four children seriously wounded in a Katyusha attack up North:
* Michal bat Revital
* Bat Zion bat Reivtal
* Avraham Natan ben Revital
* Odel Chana bat Revital

Kidnapped IDF soldiers:
* Ehud ben Malka Goldwasser
* Eldad ben Tova Regev
* Gilad ben Aviva Shalit (since June 25th!)

If you only knew - The Tzemach Tzedek said - the power of verses of Tehillim and their effect in the highest Heavens, you would recite them constantly. Know that the chapters of Tehillim shatter all barriers, they ascend higher and still higher with no interference; they prostrate themselves in supplication before the Master of all worlds, and they effect and accomplish with kindness and compassion.

(hayom yom, Sh'vat 24)

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

G-d in heaven!! what do you want from us???

click here for

(relying on the muqata for accuracy and in-depth analysis)

The Defense Ministry confirmed early Wednesday afternoon that two soldiers had been kidnapped by Hizbullah after an attack. IDF ground troops had been sent into Lebanon to search for the two. IAF jets, helicopters and UAVs were also flying above Lebanon searching for the soldiers.

Hizbullah's Al Manar TV broadcast earlier Wednesday that the organization had kidnapped the two soldiers. A senior Hizbullah official said that at least one of the allegedly kidnapped soldiers was still alive.

(rest of article)
another article....same news story

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

i repeat, did i write these?

three blog read poems (some older than others) that i like and think you should read.

what im afraid of: sj's refreshing look at the future and the beauties and sensibilities of assimilation.
(ya sarcasm is the protest of the weak, i know i know)
THE GREEN GREEN GRASS: kasamba sends her kids to corrupt the neighbors
(was that supposed to assauge ur feelings of guilt or intensify them?)
Youth tainted with Experience: pint sized rejoices with those who have seen and heard and still believe
(ach she says it so much better...go read)

Sunday, July 09, 2006

A Paper Called Life

On the entire way home from the pizza shop tonight, I was absentmindedly fiddling with the receipt.
I think it was $15.38. But who cares.
When I got back home I glanced down and happened to notice that during my fiddlation I had wrapped the paper around my finger and bent it into an interesting, unique and fascinating (aka indiscernible) design.
That set me thinking.
I figure that if everyone had their own receipt, their own paper, each one would end up with a different creation. Some would automatically create a paper airplane, some would fashion it into a rose, and some would immediately begin tearing it into shreds.
And that set me thinking.
Everyone has their own paper. A paper called Life.

(shoutout to mussi and to the other sister who reads my blog...if ya comment or email ill know how to spell ur name)

Friday, July 07, 2006

good ol' Albert

The length of a minute depends on what side of the bathroom door you are.

Wednesday, July 05, 2006's been thirty days...

Dear Friend,

Today, Wednesday, the ninth day of Tammuz, marks thirty days since Reizi passed away. On her shloshim, we'd like to acknowledge, update, remind and thank all of you who have done something for her aliyas neshama.

At first, we were numb with shock and pain. The terrible and tragic turn of events did not let the mind think clearly. We felt helpless and hopeless. Then, when we started this project to Make Reizi Proud, we suddenly had the strength to carry on despite the horrible pain. Only because of the enormously positive response that we, baruch hashem, received to the email we sent out. Each and every hachlata tova that we were told about provided a measure of comfort and chizuk.

Whatever you have done, whether you have said one perek of tehillim in her zechus, taken upon yourself to have more kavanah during davening, helped sponsor the Tzivos Hashem project or began memorizing a few lines or few perakim of Tanya-know, that every single good deed has added a brilliant ray of light to both our personal foggy and dim world right now-that of Reizi's family and close friends-as well as to the world at large. The darkness that is being experienced now in this Golus can only be remedied with such acts of goodness and kindness.

Many tefillos and hachlatos were accepted in Reizi's zechus; here is the update of the 'three ways to help' that we originally wrote about.


1. Tzivos Hashem Project-The special project that will definitely make Reizi proud is a Moshiach contest. B'ezrat Hashem at the start of the upcoming school year, this Moshiach Contest will be put into action. Children all around the world will be participating and doing their part to hasten the coming of Moshiach.
(We do, however, need additional funds for the success of the project to be complete. Checks can be made out to 'Tzivos Hashem' or 'Esty Silberstein', and sent to:
Making Reizi Proud
c/o Esty Silberstein
599 Empire Blvd
Brooklyn, NY 11213)

2. Tanya- Amazingly, with the help of Hashem and YOU, we have reached and even surpassed our original goal of having ten sets of Perakim Aleph though Yud of Tanya memorized. After those first ten sets, we now have tens and tens of other perakim being memorized in Reizis zechus.
A reminder-anyone who has taken upon themselves to memorize Tanya, you have one year to do it. In one years time, on Reizi's yahrtzeit, you will be expected to know your perek by heart, fluently. However, do not leave it for the last month or so, for as the Rebbe wrote in the Hayom Yom of Tes Sivan, it is our obligation to speak words of Torah as we walk in the streets. These holy words purify our air, and I doubt anyone will argue with me when I say that our air needs much purifying.

3. 2 Minutes 2 G-d- Baruch Hashem, we have nearly 200 people who are setting aside two minutes every night for the study of something holy, in Reizis zechus.

Many of you have committed yourselves to do your chosen hachlata until the shloshim. That is fine and good. But, if you do decide to continue, PLEASE do so! Whether it is the nightly learning or any other personal hachlata, we wish you much hatzlacha as it can only benefit you, your family and all of klal yisrael for you to carry on.

I know that Hashem is looking down at His precious children now and collecting all the ahavas yisroel that you have displayed and adding it to the huge scale that is balanced between good and evil. These good thoughts, prayers, actions and decisions will definitely tip the scale for the good.
And I know that we are certainly making Reizi proud.



A Mitzvah Project

לע''נ רייזל בת שמואל הכהן
(in memory of Reizel bas Shmuel HaKohen Rodal)

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

A Prayer for Gilad (ben Aviva)

Seems as if there's a blogchain for all to say a personal prayer for the safety and rescue of Gilad. I don't remember where I saw it first, but I see now that olah chadasha was the originator.

My prayer?

I beg of You Hashem to see all the goodness being done by Your children and release a mentally and physically happy, healthy and secure Gilad back to his family.
But don't stop there.
Oh, no.
"v'amech kulam tzadikim"-hashem, we are a nation of righteous ones!

(special and important shabbat for women coming up, click here for more details)

Sunday, July 02, 2006

the truth

"Is this your first summer working here?"

"No, its actually my third"

"Really? What makes you keep coming back to work, or shall I say, to volunteer here in this camp for special needs kids?"

"The truth? It's for selfish reasons"


"Yea, you see-I have a blast here. I just can't stay away"